Artist's rendition of one of the three planets orbiting the dwarf star.

Reminds me of Led's "Houses of the Holy"

Today Is National Teacher Appreciation Day. Or as our high school students call it: Tuesday.

In soccer, Leicester City F.C. clinched England’s Premiere League title. American sports fans, do you know what this means? No, seriously, I am asking. Does someone know what this means? 

Boston Red Sox, Pablo Sandoval, showed up to spring training 40 pounds overweight, he got in fights with the press, injured his shoulder and is out for the year while earning $17 million. ISIS could not have inflicted more damage to a baseball team. 

“Keeping Up with the Kardashians” premiered a few weeks ahead of its polar opposite show: “America’s Got Talent.” 

On “KUWTK,” all the Kardashians are mad at Rob Kardashian for dating Blac Chyna. Rob doesn’t care. You know Rob’s motto: I put the sexy in illiterate. 

In Pennsylvania, a 100-year-old woman broke her age group for the 100 meters. Unfortunately, she was disqualified when she tested positive for Metamucil. 

The previous 100-year-old 100 meter record?  90 meters. 

First time in 40 years a US cruise ship, the Carnival Cruise ship Adonia, docked in Cuba. Not sure about their slogan: “Come for the history, stay for the dysentery.”

Not sure about their slogan: “Where the Daiquiri Beats the E Coli.” 

Have you seen the viral clip of New York Yankee, Alex Rodriguez, drying off his bat? In a related story, the New York Yankees bat boy resigned. 

After the game, Rodriguez’s bat tested positive for Jock Itch.

Madonna unveiling her Hippy Grandmother Dominatrix costume.