In Chicago, two older men are wanted for robbing a pharmacy of Viagra. Police say they are considered armed and extremely amorous.

As my comedy writing friend, Jim Barach, noted, they are looking at hard time. 

At a club in Spain, Orlando Bloom threw a punch at Justin Bieber; Bloom will not be charged because he missed Bieber, Bieber will not be charged because he cannot get arrested as a singer.

Following their Derek Jeter “Re2pect” campaign, Nike now has LeBron James shirts that say “Striv2 For Greatn3ss” using his number 23 for the letters E. Here is my question: How did all of Nike suddenly contract dyslexia?

As a result of the viral clip of Denver Bronco QB, Peyton Manning, dancing badly to “Rocky Top”, NFL defenses have a new three part strategy against Manning. Step one, play “Rocky Top” on the PA system. Step two, remove the ball from a spasm-induced Manning, Step Three, walk into the end zone.

Following their Derek Jeter “Re2pect” campaign, Nike now has LeBron James shirts that say “Striv2 For Greatn3ss” using his number 23 for letters. If you ask me that is a 5hitty id3a.