Baltimore Ravens receiver, Jacoby Jones, was injured when a stripper hit him in the head with a bottle; authorities are not sure if Chardonnay hit him with a Brandy bottle or Brandy hit him with a Chardonnay bottle. 


Random Thoughts:


My new band is Dirty John and the Saskatoons.

America's Cup racing is so white it makes a Polo match look like a hood hoop game. 

Arizona safety, Rashad Johnson, lost the tip of his middle finger and posted a picture of it on Twitter. Let's all hope he doesn't get hemorrhoids.

Wally's latest nickname: Waldorf. Has the dorf already in it.

 America's Cup yachting is so white, the trash talking is: 

"Your matriarch is so plus-sized, her cotillion dress is a spinnaker."