Tuesday, August 28, 2012

And I has no cheese sammich, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

It looks like hurricane Isaac could hit Tampa Bay during the Republican National Convention. On the bright side, the conventioneers won’t have to pay to get blown.

Lance Armstrong has ended his fight against doping allegations, so the US Anti-Doping Association has stripped Lance of his seven Tour De France titles. This is horrible news for the US sports fans still following the Tour De France. All five of them.

Soon after a naked drunk driving arrest, Randy Travis was charged with assault after an argument in a Texas church parking lot. He was charged with simple assault and creating the greatest country song ever.

A US drone missile attack has killed the top Pakistan Taliban leader, Mullah Dadullah. The reason that he was targeted is because his name is Mullah Dadullah.

Sadly, Neil Armstong passed away at 82. He accomplished great things but avoided all publicity. He was the anti-Kardashian.

In San Diego, a man in his eighties died after completing a triathlon. The medical examiner has not listed the official cause of death, but many experts believe it was caused by a man in his 80’s completing a triathlon.