Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Nike sucks, Torn Slattern and Nugget Ranchers


In a speech, Mitt Romney said he met a man who was seven feet tall but "Not in sport." Not in sport? That Mitt, he is nothing if not one of the guys. "Rah, rah for your local sport franchise to excel in their upcoming contest of great import."  

Since you asked:

Man, I thought Nike was a company filled of heartless, pompous, snotty a-holes - just like their ugly, stupid leader, Phil Knight - but now I despise them even more.


While reading "Decathletes" in "Sports Illustrated"  I find out Bryan Clay wins a gold medal in the Decathlon in Beijing and Nike dumps him as he trains for a second gold medal? What grasping, shallow, greedy, thoughtless douche bags. 

The amazing impact the decathlon has had in our country's sports history, Jim Thorpe, Bob Mathias, Rafer Johnson, Bill Toomey and yes, even Bruce Jenner and then Dan O'Brien, and that is how they treat a still-competitive Olympic decathlon gold medal winner? 

If Nike was capable of shame, they would feel it. They keep an utter sleazebag like Tiger Woods, but dump a genuine classy family man like Clay. Perfect. Says it all right there. 


You will not find a group of bigger ass-bags and egotistical crank-nozzles than the cult members at Nike, not even if you go to a convention of vegan doctor Prius drivers.  

And that is saying something. (This is from experience, I interviewed there.)

They make a good running shoe, but the heart and soul of Nike died when they lost their hilarious spokesperson, Liz Dolan, and marketing genius, Steve Miller. Somewhere between 1997, when Dolan left and 2001, when Miller left, you could actually see the soul of Nike leaving its body.

Offer still stands, from one shameless whore to another, Nike, I will stop writing nasty things about Nike, and Tiger, for a fee of $100,000.
  
Just do it.