Friday, September 30, 2011

Look out, everybody, 'cause it's another surfin' daaaaaaaaaaaaaawwg

Toats McGoats and steel cut oats, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The Boston Red Sox experienced the worst September fall in baseball history; some experts are calling it downright Rick Perry-like.

To give you an idea how bad it is, even Chicago Cubs fans feel sorry for the Red Sox.

A Connecticut man was given probation for lewd acts because he blamed them on Viagra; warning: if you’re a deranged pervert for more than four hours, please contact your attorney.

NBA commissioner David Stern said he may cancel the entire next season. A whole year without professional basketball, now the entire league will now how it feels to be an LA Clipper fan.

In sad news, rumor has it Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore are going to split; he’s enjoying the success of “Two and a Half Men” and she’s enjoying being in the American Association of Retired Persons.

“The L Word” actress, Leisha Hailey, was kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight for kissing her girlfriend. And what kind of people complain about a pretty actress kissing her girlfriend? Only one kind: gay male flight attendants. Everyone else? “You go, girls.”

NBA commissioner David Stern said he may have to cancel the entire next season. “Wow, this is really going to change my life,” said nobody I know.

Since you asked:
Gotta get my grill on for tonight’s ALDS. An homage to the passing of summer in the form of grilled chicken (boneless-skinless thighs marinated in peanut oil, Mount Gay Rum and lime) grilled flour tacos with grilled corn salsa, shredded cabbage, avocado, shredded cheese and my secret sauce of salsa mixed with sour cream and a dab of honey.

That's right, you heard it hear first. It be Taco Night at Casa De Kase.


Thursday, September 29, 2011

For the phony-tough and the crazy-brave, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

To date 13 have died eating contaminated cantaloupes. And yet nobody has died eating a juicy rib-eye steak with French fries and red wine. That is all.

Rumor has it Demi and Ashton are busting up; he is enjoying his new-found success at "Two and a Half Men" and she is enjoying being a member of AARP.

People are describing the Braves and Red Sox collapse in September as downright Rick Perry like.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

More waterspout pictures from earlier today

This is a perfect picture from Saturday. It shows the water spout and the type of six-inch wave I rode*.

More waterspout pictures from earlier today

We fast-trackin’ and back-sassin’, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

After suffering a concussion and a sore hand, Michael Vick claims he is not getting calls from the referees; in fact, Vick feels the refs are hounding and dogging him. But I think he should bury this bone of contention.

A study reveals drunks know they’re making bad decisions, they just don’t care; so guys, we know you know the girl is ugly, but you did her anyway.

A Connecticut man was given probation for lewd acts because he blamed them on Viagra; he’s lucky, otherwise he was facing a stiff sentence.

Since you asked:
Got back from a high school reunion for New Trier (nay) East in Winnetka. Great time. Mainly it was really great to see my gang of childhood friends. Taco Eddie, Theo the Wonder Dog, “Good Rob” Dirty Apples, Drool, “Dirties, dirties if you please,” G. Willy Volkprude, and “Foxhole” Woody. And then, later, I saw “Bry-guy” and counselor to the stars, Heff-er-ie Lippie. So proud to be great friends with these wonderful guys for so long.

Wished Ray Delphenis, Roger Bottum and Chuck Packer were there, but next time . . .

It was also great to catch up with my boy’s lovely wives, Laura, Paula, Carla and Maureen. What class acts they are. Keeping with my boy’s tradition of marrying above their station. Good job, guys, good job.

For the most part the aforementioned great people were even more awesome and the few pompous douche-bags snots at the reunion were still the same. Only this time, as opposed to the 10 year and the 20 year reunion, I had no interest in wasting time on those oxygen thieves no matter how proud they were of themselves.

One of the real highlights was taking one of the all-time great athletes and good sports, Brian “Bry-guy” Palmer, out on a stand up board at Northwestern. We went out right during the above shown* water spout video clip at Ten AM on Saturday. The sky was grey, the water was cool to tepid, but the wind chopped it up making it challenging and chilly. The boards were hard plastic and dubious at best.

But I actually managed to catch a few shore-breakers into the beach. Six inch waves, but I got a few nonetheless.

And coming straight to the airport on Friday night to have a couple of beers and many, many laughs with my home-skillets at the Volkprude Estate was special.

Did I wish I had lost 25lbs before I left and shaved off the goatee? Possibly, but nobody really cared. The difference in age was made clear by a great woman I have always liked and was glad to talk to, Karen Mabee. She pointed out how, at the 10- year anniversary, everyone was selling hard how great their lives were.

By the 30th, only a few straggling ass-clowns were still trying to prove they were big shots. In the end it is about love of family, friends and health and happiness. When you eliminate the rest of the trivial stuff, me and my friends are among the lucky ones.

In high school, if I was watching a female guitarist/singer perform on stage who was either really hot or really ugly, that would be all I would have noticed, now matter how lovely the tune she sang.

Now I only notice the song.