Saturday, December 12, 2009


Don’t be hatin’ on the Peyton, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

(My FF team is in the playoffs)


In a “Naughty America” sex video, Tiger Woods girlfriend, Holly Sampson, said “Tiger Woods is the whitest black boy you’ve ever met.” Apparently she has never met Sammy Sosa.

In a “Naughty America” sex video, a topless Tiger Woods girlfriend, Holly Sampson, said she had sex separately with Kevin Costner and Tiger Woods, but only described Costner as well endowed. If he isn’t careful, this whole thing could get embarrassing for Tiger.

Kevin Costner and George Clooney dated two of the girls Tiger Woods dated. And to think it used to be such an honor to play the same hole as Tiger Woods.

This Tiger Woods sex scandal has brought unwanted scrutiny to the PGA. An investigation has revealed the total number of women who have slept with all the other players besides Tiger Woods is, well, zero.


Signs you might be addicted to the Tiger Woods sex scandal:

You installed a ball washer in your bathroom.

You have lengthy arguments with your Tiger puppet driver cover.

You leave yourself voice messages begging yourself to please take the name out of your message.

You start to believe cheating on your hot wife isn’t the stupidest thing you could ever do.

Your wife has taken away your balls too.


Two words: night putting.

Since you asked:

Surprisingly fun night last night staying in. Ate Trader Joe’s slider burgers, which are pretty tasty if you add pickles and ketchup, drank some red wine and watched a very underrated movie: “To Live and Die in L.A.” It marks break out roles for Willem Defoe and William Paterson and features a very young Jane Leeves who went on to be the awesome Daphne Moon in “Frasier” in the role of Defoe’s girlfriend’s girlfriend.

The movie shows great parts of the rarely seen seedy, but really cool locals in Los Angeles. Including one of my favorite places on earth, the beach area in San Pedro.


Tonicht?

Couple nights ago we saw "Julie & Julia" (Meryl is amazing, the movie not as much) and it inspired me, on a chilly, rainy day, to make Julia Child's Boeuf Bourguignon. And no I am not gay, not that there is a thing wrong with being it.

So while that is in the oven at 350 for three and a half hours, I am going to run and then workout. What with writing all morning, cooking this afternoon and then running in the cool rain, like the Northeast, I am feeling like a broke-ass version of John Irving.

And then wine, dinner and "Miracle on 34th Street." Need to get in the Christmas spirit so I can get motivated to put lights up tomorrow.

Update: had a great run in the grown of the gathering dark and rain. A glass of wine and the house, with the Boeuf Bourguignon bubbling, smells like heaven. Made a new Christmas playlist including, of course, Joni's "River", Nat's "O Holy Night" and Sarah M's "Silent Night."

God is great, Sabu.