Thursday, August 13, 2009

Why is this woman smiling? Oh, that's why . . .



Heidi Pratt claims she can have 20-30 orgasms a day. And that isn't counting all the ones she fakes with Spencer.

Can you imagine how many more she'd have if she wasn't using her thumbs all day to text?

You can tell just about everything you need to know about a person by how they respond to the statement: Heidi Pratt claims she can have 20-30 orgasms a day.

President Obama tried to make a point about private companies and the government providing the same service. He said UPS and FedEx are doing fine, it's the post office that's always having problems.

He does have a point, you never hear about some crazed worker getting a gun and going UPS or FedEx on everyone.

In a town hall meeting where he was pushing for government health care, President Obama compared the well-run, successful private shippers, UPS and Fed Ex, to the dysfunctional, billions-losing government-run Post Office.

That's like Artie Lang trying to get lucky with a hot babe by comparing himself to the Jonas Brothers.

Heidi Pratt claims she can have 20-30 orgasms a day. How is that possible? She can only count to nine.


Reason # 732 you pal, Lex, is not a politician:

I think they should form death panels, and the first people the death panels off? The people screaming against death panels.


Since you asked:
No matter how great something is, too much of it will always ruin it.

Take fresh lobsters.

We used to go down to Mexico - before the police and the gangs were openly shooting at everyone - and trade American hamburger pound-for-pound for fresh caught lobsters with the Mexican lobster fisherman. Words cannot describe how good grilled lobster with melted butter in a fresh tortilla with authentic Mexican refried beans and rice is.

But after three days of lobster, I couldn't even look at a lobster. Still can't.

That's the same thing with free speech. Free speech is one of the greatest things in the world, but if you get too much of it from angry jerks, it ruins it for everyone.

Just because you can go to a town hall meeting and scream your dislike over everything and anything you don't like doesn't mean you should and it doesn't mean we should let these idiots do it. We simply have to stop catering and caving into the vocal and annoying minority.

Sometimes all you need to do to decide on a tricky political topic is to look at who is for it and who is against it. Take Pro Choice. The women against pro choice don't all look like fat, crazy women with their hair in curlers and cold cream on their angry, pudgy faces, but they don't look anything like the hot babes who are for pro choice.

Re: facebook.

Gotta admit the facebook is pretty cool. When I first got on I thought now why would I want to stay in touch with Todd, the fat kid in second grade who stunk and ate paste? If I wanted to be in touch with Todd I would be.

But it has been pretty cool to follow folks. Not feeling the Twitter love as much but it is kinda cool to know what famous people are doing. Pretty much what we're doing, but with more money and more hassles from annoying fans.

As a die-hard undeclared/independent, it has been fun to see how shrill and stubborn both sides are, but the liberals claim to be tolerant and benevolent.

But on this health care deal, the republicans seem to be the big whining pains-in-the-ass. Obama is just trying to find what will work, but the republicans want to shoot down anything he comes up with, no matter if it is right or not.