This just in:
At a press conference where he continues to deny his steroid use, an angry Roger Clemens answered a question about the Hall of Fame by saying he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the Baseball Hall of Fame. Upon hearing this, the rat confessed that Roger also injected steroids into its ass.

A New World Record in The blame game
Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf says Benazir Bhutto's assassination was her own fault because she came to Pakistan and stood up with her head outside her car. That’s like blaming a plane crash on a tray table that wasn’t locked in its full upright position.

And let’s not forgot also to blame the laws of physics for making a speeding bullet so darned dangerous.