We gonna bring it like they sing it, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Wrong way to go green
Al Gore’s son, Al Gore III, was arrested for pot. Apparently Al’s son misunderstood when his dad told him to go green.

We’re number one
American Joey Chestnut beat five-straight winner, Takeru Kobayahi, in Nathan’s hot dog eating contest by eating 66 hot dogs in 12 minutes. Chestnut received a mustard yellow belt, a $10,000 dollar prize, a carton of toilet paper, a case of Lysol, ten candles and a sign for the bathroom door that reads “Do not come in here.”

Kobayashi was tied with Chestnut until he regurgitated several dogs at the end or as Chicago Cubs fans call losing at the end to regurgitation: committing a Steve Bartman.

Be trippin’
Al Gore's son, Al Gore III, was arrested early this morning for driving his Toyota Prius 100 MPH and having marijuana in his possession. Apparently the younger Gore wasn’t the only one on drugs if the cops think that a Prius can go 100 MPH.

Al Gore’s son, Al Gore III, was arrested for pot. Hey, give the kid a break, if you had to listen to Al Gore all the time, you’d be stoned too.

Oh yeah?
After the attacks in Britain, people all over are shocked that doctors could commit the horrible atrocity of a terrorist attack. Those people have never had a prostate exam.

Get it?
The fastest growing girls name is Nevaeh, which is heaven spelled backwards. The least popular girls name spelled backwards? Oh.