Monday, May 21, 2007

Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers?

Here is a nice image for your head
NBC cancelled Donald Trump’s “The Apprentice” and Rosie O’Donnell is leaving “The View.” Is it just me, or is it suspicious Donald Trump and Rosie are both taking time off the air together? Looks like someone’s going to have some serious make up sex.

How the mighty have fallen
NBC cancelled Donald Trump’s “The Apprentice.” It was really sad, when informed he was canned, Donald Trump wandered the halls of NBC pointing his “cobra” gesture at himself and muttering “I’m fired.”

Another pleasant image for you
The big rumor in Washington D.C. is that Vice President Dick Cheney used to hire prostitutes; yeah, for an extra $100 bucks he would get the lawyer special: he'd shoot them in the face.

He is old is what I’m sayin’
After 50 years in television, “The Price is Right” host Bob Barker is leaving the show; but don’t worry, Bob isn’t leaving show business altogether; he is going to HBO to reprise the role of the Crypt Keeper.

After 35 years as host of “The Price is Right” Bob Barker is retiring; to give you an idea how long that is, on Bob’s first show the contestants bid on a cotton gin.

For a good cause
A charity called “Clothes Off Our Back” says it will raise money by auctioning clothes worn by the stars of “American Idol.” You can get Randy Jackson’s shirt, Paula Abdul’s blouse, Simon Cowell’s t-shirts and Ryan Seacrest’s pink panties.

Not again
Last weekend in Virginia, President Bush attended an event and at one point he conducted a 400-piece orchestra. As expected, the band was then attacked by insurgents and utter chaos ensued.

No mas Hamas
A Hamas child’s TV show features a Mickey Mouse-like character, named Farfur, who preaches hatred against Israel. Farfur is an Arabic word that means Mel Gibson.

That was great
They had the second republican presidential debate. I thought it was funny when that one rich old white guy said that thing to the other rich old white guy and all the other rich old white guys laughed and laughed.

Just like that
On “America Idol” the leading candidate, Melinda Doolittle was voted off. That means the winner will not be the most qualified. Just like our presidential elections.