Since you asked:
Just like O.J. Simpson, Paris Hilton is the personification of proof that wealth and fame are not, by themselves, honorable traits. (To her credit, we do not know if Paris has brutally slaughtered anyone . . . yet)
Is there anything more fun than despising rich, tasteless and tacky narcissists, like OJ and Paris?
In my experience, I have known three horribly greedy full-blown narcissists. Two were a man and a woman who were briefly married to each other –they were hilariously entertaining right up until you wanted to kill them - and the third I worked with as a broker, albeit briefly.
Although all three were unarguably somewhat physically attractive (even with her scary man-hands, we have to admit Paris is good looking) none of the three were nearly as good-looking as they thought they were.
The woman I knew would ask dead seriously; “Do you think Christie Brinkley is attractive?” Her real question was; “Do you think Christie Brinkley is more attractive than I am?” The answer was clearly and obviously yes but if you had said that she would throw an icy cold tantrum.
All three narcissists could not pass a mirror without hilariously and obliviously primping lovingly and longingly. Although briefly entertaining to be around due to their immense and endless self-created dramas, they eventually wore everyone out with their intense and bottomless selfishness. Not one of the three have any real friends now that I know of. You’d think that would be sad, pathetic and regrettable, right? Wrong. It doesn’t bother them at all because they don’t notice or care about anyone else anyway.
Tina Fey said the cast and crew of “Saturday Night Live” had a bet to see how long, if ever, Paris Hilton would ask about someone else, as in “how are you?” Finally somebody won when Paris inquired if Maya Rudolph was Italian. (She isn’t)
The best part of openly making fun of narcissists is that they never catch on because they never notice anyone else but themselves. The game never ends. Paris Hilton will go to her un-grieved grave thinking she is loved and adored by her “fans.” (This is not a joke, Paris actually refers to the public as her fans) The guy we worked with actually had the lengthy-but-hilarious nickname “But enough about me, what do you think of me?” that we would mimic in his impossibly high voice.
Whenever you would talk to one of these three about somebody, anybody, else, they would instantly get this hurt and bored look in their eyes as if they could barely endure the conversation until it turned back to them. As soon as the conversation went back to them, they would veritably sparkle with tingly joy and excitement. To paraphrase another great narcissist, Terrell Owens, they loves them some them.
But their self-absorption swung both ways. The woman narcissist I knew was insanely paranoid about being stalked. Although nobody, to my knowledge, ever actually stalked her, in the time I knew her, she claimed to have had at least thirty stalkers. She averaged one stalker a quarter.
All of us who knew the three narcissist had a running bet on how long they would go before contacting someone without wanting something. The inside joke was to open every conversation with the words “Hi (insert narcissist) What do you need?” Not once did they ever catch on. Not once did they ever not need something. Once again, the game never ended until we finally quit.
That’s the good news. It is really easy to get rid of being trapped in a costly one-way relationship with a selfish narcissist. Just stop doing things for them. Trust me, I decided to do just that and I haven’t heard from any of them in many, many years.
Folks, as much as it may hurt at first, we have to stop lavishing attention on Paris Hilton. (As a source for skank jokes, this is going to really hurt me, but it is a price I am willing to pay) As long as we will buy the tabloids that show Paris in mid bitch-fest at Hydes with another diva, she is not going to go away. TMZ, and “The National Enquirer” if you can read this, please, we are begging you, stop showing us Paris Hilton.
Just like with O.J.’s book and his upcoming “Fox” interview, as far as Paris Hilton is concerned, we have to boycott and ignore her if we want her to get the message: please, please go away.
Speaking of "SNL" Ludicrous, Ludicroush, that guy from "Crash" was hilarious.