Wednesday, March 08, 2006

It is hard out here


Here at “A Little Bit Bad” we have received the following statement on the growing drug accusations against Barry Bonds.

Barry Bonds attorney, Michael Rains, issued a statement. Please allow me to summarize;

“Poor, poor Barry. Everyone is out to get Barry and they always have been out to get him. Why? Because they are jealous and greedy. All poor Barry has ever wanted to do is go about his saintly way of playing baseball, but no, everyone is out to attack poor Barry with lies, lies I tell you.

In fact, anyone and everyone who says anything bad about Barry is either a liar, or a whore, or both. Filthy lying whores all.

In addition, nothing is, nor has it ever been, Barry’s fault. Ever. As Barry’s fellow misunderstood persecuted icon Terrell Owens put it so modestly, eloquently and accurately by comparing himself to our lord and Savior;

“Remember, people hated on Jesus too.”

“Amen. Let us pray for Barry.”  

“P.S. F.Y.I., I, Barry’s lawyer, Michael Rains, am a wretched and soulless tool.”