Friday, January 13, 2006

Oh we gonna throw do



Oh we gonna throw down the hoe down, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


Makes sense
In sad news, Phyllis Gates, the former wife of dead gay movie star legend Rock Hudson, passed away; services will be Saturday with the eulogy delivered by Liza Minelli and Katie Holmes


Give it up
It’s official, Angelina Jolie is pregnant with Brad Pitt’s baby; at what point are Angelina and Brad going to admit they are more than friends? When they have grandchildren? “Come on Nanny and Papa, tell the truth, are you two an item?”


Oh sure
This grilling of nominated supreme court judge, Samuel Alito, is getting serious. Today Judge Alito denied that he and Angelina Jolie are more than friends.


Oh, him
The new NBC show “Book of Daniel” is controversial because it features Jesus as a recurring character; in fact, it’s the only TV show that has a religious figure if you don’t count Donald Trump who thinks he’s god.


Could you repeat that?
A study reveals that people who drink too much alcohol are more susceptible to memory loss maladies; in addition, people who drink too much alcohol are more susceptible to memory loss maladies.


Can’t you hear me knockin’?
In an interview “King Kong” actor Jack Black admitted he has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder; man, I hope I never get OCD, knock on wood 475 times.


Here is my question about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: does a neurotic dyslexic have Disorder Compulsive Obsessive?


Packing ‘em back on
A market research firm has discovered that the percentage of Americans who consider over-weight people unattractive has dropped considerably. Americans are finding heavy people more and more attractive; in a related story, Kirsty Alley has just quit Jenny Craig.


A Market Research firm has discovered that Americans are finding over-weight people more and more attractive; well, except for Michael Moore, but other than him, Americans are finding heavy people more attractive.


A market research firm has discovered that the percentage of Americans who consider over-weight people unattractive has dropped considerably. Americans are finding heavy people more and more attractive; in a related story, more Americans are going to bars and getting really drunk.


Old reference
At a high school in Canton Ohio, 13% of the girls are pregnant. There are so many girls pregnant the school mascot is a dead rabbit.


Newer
At a high school in Canton Ohio, 13% of the girls are pregnant. There are so many girls pregnant the school symbol is a blue pregnancy test stick.