Wednesday, November 23, 2005

The TBird is the wor

The T-Bird is the word, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers



Imitation is not the sincerest form of flattery
Tomorrow guys get to be served food, they drink beer and lie around watching television all day with their hands down their pants; it’s called Thanksgiving, or as I call it: My Kevin Federline impression.



Yo, Juliet, what up wit’ ‘dat light in yonder window, gaarrll?
Rapper 50 Cent announced he will launch a series of books that combine literature and hip hop; this is for those folks who want to get their freak on with Jane Austen.


Sort of
Rumor has it that, to boost publicity, the producers of “Desperate Housewives” are going to kill off one of the housewives. Do you think killing off a housewife will boost their publicity? Well,  it worked for OJ Simpson and Robert Blake.


Hot for teacher
Hot blonde 25-year-old Florida middle school teacher Debra Lafave pleaded guilty to having sex with her 14-year-old male student; reportedly they had sex three times and she performed oral sex multiple times. She was sentenced to three years of house arrest and he was sentenced to a lifetime of shamelessly bragging to his buddies.


Not good
At the American Music Awards, Lindsay Lohan’s interpretation of Stevie Nicks’s “Edge of Seventeen” was not received well by critics. In fact Lindsay sounded so bad it made me get in my car and crash just to get the sound out of my head.


At the American Music Awards, Lindsay Lohan’s version of Stevie Nicks’s “Edge of Seventeen” was not received well by critics. How bad was it? One critic said, as a singer, Lindsay Lohan is a tremendous driver.


Hot blonde 25-year-old Florida middle school teacher, Debra Lafave, pleaded guilty to having sex with a 14-year-old male student after he turned her in to his parents; she was sentenced to three years of house arrest; he was sentenced to thirty years of hearing his buddies ask; “Dude, what were you thinking when you turned her in?”



Not a good idea
To protest the start of the New Jersey bear season, animal rights activists are dressing up as bears. That’s nuts, that’s as dangerous as dressing up as a Turkey on Thanksgiving in front of Kirsty Alley’s house.