Thursday, February 06, 2003

Don't bring that weak stuff all up in this here hizzhouse, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


LeBron, Lebron likes his money, part 4
LeBron James should be ineligible. Not for accepting the jerseys but for accepting the fact that a Wes Unseld jersey is worth more than a Gayle Sayers jersey. Now that is criminal.

But seriously, LeBron James has been ruled eligible, and that is good. Now, if LeBron had accepted a pair of Wes Unseld vintage shorts, he should be kicked out. Remember those things? Wes had a huge butt and thighs and these tiny, tiny shorts. Those shorts should have been ruled ineligible.

In fact, the only person in history who looked worse in shorts than Wes Unseld is Richard Simmons.

We can all relax now . . .
It looks like Turkey will align with the U.S. over Iraq. I think I speak for a lot of people when I say, oh goody.

When it comes to choking, Knight is a giver, not a taker
Former Indiana coach Bobby Knight got his 800th career win. For Knight, this comes on the heels of another milestone, yesterday in practice, Knight choked his 500th player.

How old is he?
After the Super Bowl loss, there are questions as to what the Oakland Raiders will do their high-priced, aging stars. For example, to give you an idea how old Jerry Rice is, he is the only active player whose current jersey is classified as vintage.

Not only war is hell
The ABC “20/20” Michael Jackson interview aired tonight, and I think it was in the best interest of our national security. Compared to a candid interview with Michael Jackson, Saddam Hussein and the entire Iraqi army doesn’t seen nearly as scary.

Saddam Hussein is still boldly predicting his army will vanquish any attack from our U.S. troops. Ewww, take it easy on us, Saddam, we’re still shaking from the scary Dessert Storm memory of those Iraqi soldiers surrendering to a CNN film crew.

Say it ain't so, Jacko . . .
Michael Jackson says he felt betrayed by the producers of his “20/20” interview. Jackson said ABC promised to protect him, but in the end, they left him dangling like a baby from a hotel balcony.